Some expoundings by me on the nature of the broccoli...

I once heard that the cauliflower plant is an albino broccoli plant...is that true?
and Have you ever heard of Brocciflower? What is it?

To which I respond:

Brocciflower is this pale white (sea green by Crayola's standards) cross- breeding of broccoli and cauliflower, as the name so cleverly implies. I've never eaten it, but it was trademarked or whatever a couple of years ago and is available here and there.

However, you are wrong in assuming that broccoli and cauliflower are plants...they are in fact animals, not unlike sponges. In fact, I find that broccoli and sponges have the same amount of culinary desirability. You see, as I learned in evolutionary biology this year, when the move was being made by many sea animals onto land to try out the new fad of walking, the sponge went along, seeing as it is very much prey to peer pressure. As a matter of fact, peer pressure is the only natural predator sponges have. Anyways, they grew legs and walked about on land, but realized they were very tired from all this sudden movement, so they gave up walking, left it to the other animals, and let their legs evolve into tentacles, then into what appeared to be roots, but which were more movable than these plant homologues. This was the prototypical broccoli.

As we all know, this broccoli animal was found to be quite tasty by early man (hey, he also probably had bad posture so what can you say?), and soon the broccoli herds (the technical term is a spittle of broccoli) were greatly diminished. However, a mutation of the normal broccoli, the albino broccoli, was greatly feared by hunter-gatherer pre-society man, since it was held to be a ghost form of the dead broccoli come back for vengeance. (these were the stories they told to explain that broccoli's color. mythology is strange) So this new strain came to survive better and soon evolved into its own species. This new species is what we today call cauliflower. Of course, much broccoli survived in the Midwest of what is now the United States, since the people there were, as now, too slow to catch the broccoli and cauliflower animals. So what, you may ask, is brocciflower? A new crossbreeding of these animals? Nay, nay...it is in fact the once-thought-lost missing link in the evolution of these two vegetables. In fact, an article in Science (Nov. 23, 1992) heralded brocciflower as the "coecelanth of the invertebrate animals". Yup. So they found a small flock of them (the technical term is a rapscallion of brocciflower), bred them in captivity, and now kill them and sell them as they do the other two vegetables, er animals.

And that, my friend, is the Truth. You need look no further than Todd, your Science Source (tm).
Thank you.
Good night.

(Remember, this is still considered to be revolutionary science by many of those who hang on to old ideas, so you may encounter resistance. As Albert Einstein once said "Great minds often encounter negligable resistance from moving through the air, but great resistance from...oh, what was it I was talking about again?" (Yes, that is the actual version of the quote, which was mis-quoted in an autobiography of him years later so that he appeared much smoother.))